Thoughts and Observations

I hate every Christmas exclaimed my son.

I wonder why? I asked his mum.

I reckon it’s you, my dearest replied.

You know that you also can’t abide:

The tinsel that trips,

The baubles that break

The turkey that’s tough

And the stuffing that’s baked

Too much I cry, at the family meal,

can’t we be on an even keel?

Now that was last Christmas, I must admit,

But this Christmas I will do my bit,

To make it more festive,

a feast no less; I will try my bestive

Well, you find a word that rhymes with festive

I turned a new leaf and shopped early this year.

A tree, a turkey, a Waitrose mince pie

Out came the card with a joyous cry,

I never use cash with that I’m resigned,

To my horror, I found my card was declined

The wife’s cleared me out and left me behind.

Off she has trotted with Santa I hear.

Gone to the land of elves and reindeer.

She’s left me marooned with my turnip and pie.

Please don’t mind if I cry and sigh.

What can I do? Please men I ask,

As I stand before you as one who’s outcast.

How can I make up, for my sordid past?

Of moaning and groaning at Christmas’s vexed.

Oh, what should I do to be less taxed?

So, a plea to you all, please don’t be like me

Be joyful and cheerful with those who are dear.

Eat, drink and be merry but please play your part,

Lay tables and wash up and smile and cheer.

Above all remember, at this time of year,

Life should be full of kindness and beer.

So, from my shop doorway, I will wave with my pie,

And wish you Happy Christmas and leave you,

Goodbye.